Got a top ten list? Burn it!

Lists are like New Year's resolutions. They're a mental attempt to make order out of an inherently messy world.

What is it with lists? And how the turnover of a year acts as an implosion charge for a nuclear explosion of lists.

Lists have always been a staple of magazine editors. I was one for 30 years. My rule was to always have odd numbers. I don’t know why, but I liked to avoid the number “10” — too ordinary. I have good company, judging from a survey titles just this week:

  • 7 types of clothing you should get rid of immediately — Cosmopolitan
  • 19 times pop culture was embarrassingly offensive in 2015 — Buzzfeed
  • 11 essential rules to dressing like an adult — Men’s Health
  • 10 smart tricks for packing up your ornaments — Good Housekeeping (oops)
  •  5 tips for happy [Public WiFi] customers — InformationWeek
  • 3 ways to make millennials manager material — GovExec
  • 6 ways to change your running for the better in 2016 — Runner’s World
  • Top 8 cloud concerns — TechTarget

Now that I’m not a magazine editor any more, I scratch my head trying to understand the rationale for cramming everything into definitive lists.

Even the federal government has gotten into the act:

  • 5 invasive pests: You can help stop their spread — USDA.gov
  • 6 smart energy resolutions for 2016 — Energy.gov
  • 6 tips for using your credit card this season — CFPB.gov

Maybe this is the list that started it all:

  • 10 Most wanted — FBI.gov

The Food and Drug Administration likes lists. This is from FDA.gov, “Making a list & checking it twice.”

Health and Human Services has a large potential for lists, but it merely went with, “As we embark on 2016, here is a glimpse back at some of our incredible work from this year.” Probably too much to list.

Lists are like New Year’s resolutions. They’re a mental attempt to make order out of an inherently messy world. You know it. Running a federal program, dealing with 25 people who can say no but struggling to get to the one who can say yes sure isn’t a logical, check-mark process. Preparing budgets, nuancing memoranda, pondering over that email, deciding who gets a raise or promotion, proposing even a small policy change, evaluating vendor bids, thinking about your own next move: No 13-tip lists can, in reality, help you do those tasks.

Fact is, gut, intuition, the sharp parry, the strategic step back are among the intangibles we use to get our personal and professional lives from A to B. All those lists tend to quantify the obvious. You know when to get rid of the Members Only jacket or trim away that Kentucky waterfall. The right financial moves to prepare for retirement? We only wish that could be reduced to 1-2-3.

Are you a resolution person or list subscriber? Let me know and why.

Meantime, happy new year and take the rest of the week off.

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