Okay, so I take a couple of days off (two weeks, but who’s counting) and come back to chaos.

First, they changed the locks and the security codes at the office. So was this a message directed at me? Like “stay outside!”

I finally got in disguised as a pizza delivery guy and they seemed happy to see me, even without the pizza. I had been away so long I sort of forgot our mission. I asked the gang here whether we did radio stuff or was this a weenie factory? As if with one voice they responded “weenie factory.”

But it turns out that even in this slow time of year, things continue to happen.

For example:

Postal Early Outs

Thanks to lagging revenue (e-mails are replacing letters with stamps on them), the U.S. Postal Service is working on a new business plan. One order of business: To offer as many as 40,000 employees the option to take early retirement. The majority of those who would be eligible for early-outs are under the old Civil Service Retirement System.

Normal retirement, for an immediate annuity, for CSRS folks is at age 55 with 30 years; age 60 with 20 years; or at age 62 with 5 years of service. The starting annuity is based on the individuals salary (the high-3 year average) and length-of-service. The annuity is indexed to inflation, a perk unknown in private pension plans. People who take early outs can continue their health insurance for life. They can pick any plan in the FEHBP and pay the same premiums as younger, healthy workers. And by providing a survivor annuity (and it can be a minimal amount) they can insure that their spouse will continue to have lifetime coverage after the fed dies.

The downside of early-retirement is that it usually does not come with a buyout payment. Some agencies are offering both (on a very limited basis) but the USPS is not going to do that. Buyouts are worth a maximum of $25,000, but after deductions the take-home payment is in the $16,000 to $18,000 range.

Officials of the American Postal Workers Union were supposed to meet with USPS brass yesterday. Details to come. Meantime, check this out.

White Collar Pay Raise

Before leaving for their long Independence Day at-home-work period, Congress took a key step toward approving a 3.9 percent pay raise for white collar (GS) federal workers. The increase, okayed by the important House Appropriations Committee, would be effective with the first pay period beginning on or after January 1, 2009. The increase is one percentage point higher than the amount proposed in President Bush’s budget.

Assuming the 3.9 percent figure holds, feds in Houston, New York, LA and San Francisco, Washington-Baltimore, Chicago, Denver, Seattle, Atlanta, Philadelphia and other major federal centers would likely get even more once locality pay rates are set for them. That won’t happen until the end of the year.

The 3.9 percent raise isn’t chiseled in stone, but it is looking better all the time.

Fire Fighters

Finally, a tip of the firehat to the nation’s federal firefighters and other emergency personnel who have been working overtime in hot, unhealthy dangerous-to-deadly conditions to stamp out forest fires in the west.

Thanks to Connie Hendryx and NFFE local president Randy T. Meyer (who both work in hard-hit California) for reminding us of the fabulous work the crews (in the field and in the office) are doing.

Nearly Useless Factoid

If we can believe what we find on the internet… your Bluetooth is named for a 10th century Danish Viking and King. According to the PaloWireless Bluetooth Resource Center, “Harald Blåtand united and controlled Denmark and Norway (hence the inspiration on the name: uniting devices through Bluetooth).” And the blue tooth part? That’s named for either his dark hair (“Blåtand means dark complexion”) or the more “popular, (but less likely reason), was that Old Harald had a inclination towards eating Blueberries, so much so his teeth became stained with the colour”.

To reach me: mcausey@federalnewsradio.com

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