Off with their (make that your) heads

Suppose the spouse of a self-important U.S. senator or representative gets chewed out by a Park Ranger at Yellowstone National Park because he or she got out of the car with the grandchildren for a photo op with a nearby grizzly bear. And her cubs. Yelled at them before, maybe, they got chewed up by an angry, protective mama bear.

And suppose the Senate spouse — rather than considering herself lucky, takes umbrage at the uppity ranger in the funny hat who needed to learn some manners. Especially when dealing with visiting VIPs from the nation’s capital. Oh, the humanity!

What if an FAA air controller diverts an aircraft that was supposed to land at Dulles International to Washington (Ronald Reagan) National airport because of runway traffic or weather conditions. And suppose that commercial or private jet is carrying the chairman of a major congressional committee.

The chair is already (as in nearly always) running late and finds that, because of the diversion, his driver is at the wrong airport. That either means that the pol will either have to fork over for a cab or, more likely, call a long-suffering aide at home to come get him. Or her. Heads must roll.

What’s a powerful politician to do when the Labor Department’s unemployment reports don’t jibe his economic (or political) readings. Can’t those bureaucrats in Washington get anything right? Or if an IRS employee questions the deductions of a favored campaign contributor? Break out the thumbscrews! Better yet…

Solution: Dust off the 1870s Holman Rule, which allows individual members of Congress to nominate individual or groups of federal workers for places in the unemployment line.

Sounds dumb. But remember this is Washington, where voters from all over the country send us their, uh, best. The men and women chosen (often with the help of gerrymandered districts) to best represent them. Or at least get them out of the state.

The Holman Rule, which rested in peace for more than 100 years, was revived earlier this year to encourage an allegedly arrogant, indifferent or maybe even crooked bureaucracy sit up and take notice.

The so-called Holman rule, at one time, sort of made sense. It was a time when the political winners doled out the best government jobs. And people with friends in high political places could get reasonably good federal jobs in their home towns. The Holman Rule, perhaps like the Salem witch trials, probably seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, not so much.

The Holman Rule surfaced the other day when three members of Congress attached a rider (amendment) to a so-called “minibus” of bills dealing with defense, veterans affairs, and appropriations bills to fund energy and water projects.

What the members did was to add yet another item to the omnibus bill abolishing the jobs of 89 employees of the Congressional Budget Office. Their apparent sin: Coming up with budget and spending projections of future costs of different legislation and programs.

The three House members, Reps. Mark Meadows (R-N.C.), Scott Perry (R-Pa.) and Jim Jordan (R-Ohio), don’t like or trust the objectivity of the numbers coming out of the CBO which “scores” future costs and savings. Although the CBO generally is labeled nonpartisan, the number-crunches invariably get somebody’s knickers in a twist.

The Washington area congressional delegation (all Democrats from Maryland, Virginia and D.C. with tons of federal voters) blasted the plan, which in theory could put almost every federal job in the crosshairs of politicians. Many see it as part of the drive to make federal workers more responsive, and presumably better at and more grateful for their jobs, by making them “at will” employees. Meaning they could be fired much quicker and easier than under what critics say are cumbersome civil service rules that encourage sloth and sometimes downright crookedness.

Odds are the targeted CBO employees will still be in their same jobs this time next year. But this is probably not the last time the Holman Rule will be used — if not to actually fire people — to at least get the attention of bureaucrats everywhere.

Meantime, next time you see somebody stuffing a puma or bear into their car at the park and you work for the government, you have a decision to make. Do you do your duty, or do you maybe risk losing your job for doing your duty? After all, you never know who the wannabe stuffer is. And is it worth finding out?

Nearly Useless Factoid

By Jory Heckman

Sarah T. Hughes has been the only woman to administer the presidential oath of office. Hughes, a U.S. District Court judge, swore Lyndon B. Johnson into office on Air Force One after John F. Kennedy’s assassination.

Source: Wikipedia

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