Being a fed is like living in a nudist colony at the base of a dormant but still active volcano. Or being in an all-glass group house. The scenery is great, but you never know who or what’s out there.

Case in point:

I once had a sergeant who had a one-liner for everything. He also worshiped at the shrine of John Wayne. For example he would tell us skinny, head-shaved wretches that “if you ain’t scared it means you haven’t been paying attention!!!”

We never quite figured out what he was talking about, but to a scared 17-year-old it seemed profound at the time.

Fast forward to now. And to you, pilgrim. (Me too, John Wayne.)

The bad news is that Congress—at least major portions of it—has been after you for a long time. At times, the White House too.

A presidential panel first suggested the federal pay freeze and a new system (the chained CPI) that would reduce future cost-of-living adjustments for federal, military and Social Security retirement benefits. The two-year freeze turned into three. The lower COLA plan, which would save a ton of money over time, ran into major political opposition from groups representing federal, military and Social Security retirees. But it is likely to return.

Meantime, there are pending budget plans to make some major, some minor, changes at your expense. One would trim your take home pay by requiring you to contribute more of each paycheck toward your retirement. Another would gradually increase your share of your health plan premium. The government now pays about 72 percent (on average) for white collar feds. The Postal Service, which wants to set up its own health plan, now pays about 75 percent of the total tab.

Some of the proposed changes have been around for years. And while they haven’t happened yet, that doesn’t mean they can’t or won’t happen.

So, what does this period of relative calm mean for feds at the foot of the dormant but still active legislative volcano? You should get an idea very soon as Congress returns from its most recent rest-period.

While its been a quiet (good) week on the political fear front, things are probably going to get worse before they start getting better. If they do at all.

Maybe that’s what Sgt. Orr was talking about! Turns out the man was a genius, which I certainly didn’t appreciate at the time.

NEARLY USELESS FACTOID:

There are approximately 1,900 active volcanoes on Earth. (Source: National Geographic)

Editor’s Note: It is unclear how many nudist colonies can actually be found at the base of those volcanoes. – by Julia Ziegler

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