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If you happen to sit on a hot stove (why you would do that is another issue) and get burned, you have a couple of options. The next day, when you are seeking a landing space for your rear end you can either:

1. Decide to avoid the stove which may still be hot and try another approach.
2. Embrace the hope-springs-eternal concept and give it one more shot.

What could possible go wrong, right? If you said right, wrong!

Uncle Sam tried it again yesterday: A second 3-hour delayed opening of federal offices, with those who made it allowed to leave after ‘only’ five hours on the job.

Given the Washington area’s notorious gridlock (especially but not exclusively) in the Northern Virginia and Maryland suburbs, getting to work intact is a challenge on a good day. 

This week, after a couple of feet of snow (including 40 inches in one spot in Montgomery County, Maryland), it was even worse than usual. In addition to the near-record blizzard, consider that the D.C.-area gets a constant influx of new arrivals. These are people (according to their own accounts) who drove beautifully back home in Salt Lake City, Bozeman or Boston, but who lose it when they get here. Plus we locals, although accustomed to the hills and traffic circles, and tourists and diplomats, just don’t do well in snow.

Every workday, rain, snow or sleet, several hundred thousand folks from Maryland cross into Virginia to work at the Pentagon and other places. Virginians flock to the FBI downtown, or Homeland Security in the city. Folks from the District work for the IRS and Social Security in Maryland. It is cross-pollination worthy of a PBS documentary. And it happens seven days a week.

On Monday the government was closed. Except, as per usual, for emergency personnel and the growing number of feds with telework agreements with their agencies. Or those who had bosses who told them on Friday (a half day) to take their laptops with them and to stand by, telework-agreements or not.

Monday for those who had to work — emergency feds, utilities, merchants, the media — was a slog but it was better because so many feds were snug in their beds. Or at least not out on the unplowed roads, seeking parking places buried under several feet of refrozen, solid-as-a-cinder-block snow.

Ditto Tuesday, which gave road crews lots of badly needed space and time to do their jobs. Most power failures were dealt with within hours rather than days.

Wednesday — and yesterday — were different. The 200 federal/private/state officials who conferred on the workday status thought it would be a good idea to seek a return to normalcy (which here is often not a good idea). Feds were told told they could come in 3-hours later than usual, but go home at the regular time. Thursday was made because overnight single-digit temps created black ice which permits even the most skilled 4-wheel driver to spin out.

Suffice to say that for many — maybe even most — feds and non feds, Thursday was another WTF ordeal. A good day for towing companies and auto body shops. For others, not so much.  Several cynical readers have speculated that people who ordered the mass D.C. version of the Charge of the not-so-light Brigade, maybe had comfy places to stay, and/or a government-supplied car, driver and guaranteed parking place if they too had to make the trek. Or a convoy of cops to permit them to move. At your expense. Some people …

Anyhow it is almost over. It’s Friday, we’ve all learned something. So would anybody who cares remind me, again, exactly what we learned?

Nearly Useless Factoid

By Meredith Somers

One of the worst traffic jams on record occurred in August 2010 along the China National Highway. An influx of large trucks coupled with road construction caused thousands of cars to jam up along 60 miles of roadway. Drivers were stuck for more than a week, moving no more than 0.6 miles per day.

Source: Wikipedia

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